The Jerry Springer Show

This is not for Kids or people easily offended, this is my experience at the Jerry Springer show and therefore more than a little obscene.

Here is the Ridiculous story of one mans trip to the Jerry Springer show.

We get there wait in a small line to go through the metal detectors, then are taken up to a waiting room through a 10' X 10' elevator with 15 ft ceilings. In the waiting room, obviously, we waited for about an hour and a half. People were all crowded and bored so jokes were told by the others around me. People laughed at others trying to use the "Vegas" style vending machines. Meaning there was a good chance you were loosing your money, it was possible to get chips but "the house" usually won.

Then someone walked in looking to tell us some news, that news being...."As you may or may not know, this is not an ordinary episode of Jerry. Tonight it is the Uncensored Jerry Springer Episode. This means there will be excessive language and nudity, if this offends anyone let me know now!" After the laughter stopped we were filed onto the stage. The magic was about to begin.

The MC slash main behind-the-scenes guy comes out tells us the run down, "Hey everyone as you know this is an uncensored show and therefore you guys can be as raunchy and foul mouthed as you want to be, but only when I tell you to. "This show is going to be all about you the audience the questions you ask are what make the show so be as filthy and disgusting as you can be when asking questions, but be funny, don’t just stand up there and say the F word a bunch of times be creative." "Oh and the louder and more you cheer the more there clothes come off."

So then Jerry comes out and does a little warming up of the crowd. He tells some jokes does a little Q & A Jerry then tells us to have fun.

The MC comes out again and this time tells us the show is about to begin and then gives us some final rules and guidelines. He finishes by saying "if you don't know what to do look at me and I will tell you what to do." (That is exactly what I did for the entire first segment.)

Then the ridiculousness of Jerry Springer Uncensored began. Out came two strippers, who for the rest of the time would be dancing around a poll just off to the side of the stage.

The first guest is a girl who thinks her boyfriend is cheating on her with another girl, turns out she is right and in fact Jerry has that girl back stage. Ding Ding Ding the girl from back stage comes out and immediately that start trying to kill each other. After a couple of minutes of fighting, for no apparent, reason they take off there clothes and decide to fight naked. As the crowed is yelling "F*ck her up F*ck her up", they roll on the ground pulling each others hair and punch each other all while Jerry just stands in the crowd and smiles at the insanity that he has created.

The boyfriend then comes out and the crowd just yells "F*ck you f*gg*t", over and over again. This is then where Jerry goes into the crowd to gets people, much braver than I, to say something to the boyfriend about how there d*ck is bigger than his, which always resulted in a "Then show us yours then" cheer by the crowd. There were great insults people calling people R Kelly or A white Carlton, from Fresh Prince, your moma jokes, all the staples. This would go on until no one had anything more to say and then...back to naked fighting.

Similar story lines and acts happened two more times girls come out naked fight. Girls stripped on a poll just of stage and the crowd made fun of everyone including if someone in the crowd said something dumb they to were then torn apart by the crowd yelling something like' "suck my d*ck you f*gg*t" or some other completely out-of-control chant. This was truly the most insane yet greatest thing that has ever happened to me.

It was funny yet wrong all at the same time, but then for the end it just got that much more ridiculous.

The same story line for the last segment except that the women in the first parts were cute, white trash, but good-looking, these ladies in the last segment were GINORMOUS. I mean huge. This was not as fun to watch. It also took a turn for the worst when the crowd was chanting, "F*ck you, you fat f*ck." My mouth was wide open and if you could see my face at the time you would no exactly what a dumbfounded expression should look like. I was in shock.

The show ended shortly after with Jerry's somewhat final thoughts and then clapping until done. We were thanked and then on are ways.
I will be trying again very soon to get another set of those tickets.